Ode to Burger and Lobster

Burger and Lobster is right down my street, it serves fantastic food, it’s excellent value for money and it’s civilised. Don’t get me wrong, I can rough it with the best of them (as you have seen) but my preference is to sit in a lovely, well lit, comfortable restaurant where you can have a good old natter. Burger and Lobster delivered all of this and more. I literally could not fault it. A stomping, wonderful, take me there every week for the rest of my life, 10/10.

I’m sure you’re all familiar with the concept, it’s been around for a while. A limited menu; £20 for a burger, a whole lobster or a lobster roll, all served with fries and salad. A no reservation system. A healthy queue at all times. Unlimited hype in the world of social media.

I knew all this before I visited. What I didn’t know was:

1. They have a civilised queuing system. No standing in the rain for 2 hours without communication. Oh no. Not in Mayfair darling, don’t be daft. You stand in a short queue to put your name on the list and are then free to pop off to the pub and they will call you when you have a table.

2. There is a lovely bar with stools which you can wait at if there is space and you can also eat there if you choose, which is much quicker than waiting for a table.

3. They serve a really really nice Sauvignon Blanc at said bar.

4. They don’t just serve the £20 lobster. You can buy more. Big ones. Really big ones. They actually had an 8 pounds 3 ouncer on offer, which by my maths is bigger than the average new born baby! Woah!

5. The staff are absolutely charming. All of them.

6. The deserts are delicious.

I’d had an especially trying afternoon last Tuesday so when I arrived at 6:15pm I was delighted to be able to put my name on the list, take a seat at the bar and order a bottle of wine whilst waiting for my friend.

Once she arrived we were having such a lovely time that we decided to hang on for a table. However, if we’d been super hungry, the bar would have been perfectly fine and would have meant no waiting at all.

When we were seated, after about 90 minutes, our waiter started to run through the menu. We quickly made it clear that we would not be wasting our time or money on a burger, it was lobster all the way. He therefore suggested that rather than getting a £20 one each, we should get one to share. The £20 lobster weighs a pound and a half but by sharing we would get more lobster and pay for less shell! What a fabulous idea. We were like putty in his hands, whatever he said, we were going with it.

Once we ordered it was all really quick. Our sides arrived within minutes. These are included in the price and I was delighted to see that we still got a portion each despite only ordering one lobster.

Then a few minutes later the main event arrived, having been finished off on the grill. Check out the sexy bib!

There was loads of meat. A surprising amount in the claws. I was actually full by the time I’d polished it off, although I certainly wouldn’t have said no to more.

We couldn’t resist putting him back together when we’d finished. Perhaps because we were onto our second bottle of wine at this stage….

Despite being full, our waiter persuaded us to have a desert by promising us something extra special. The options were creme brûlée with salted caramel or vanilla cheesecake. However, he told us that he could arrange a cheesecake with a sneaky layer of salted caramel and then a layer of biscuit crumble. Gimme gimme gimme. I would go back for the pudding alone!

So, as far as I am concerned Burger and Lobster is top of the pops. I loved it so much that I have written an ode to it.

No joke.

Prepare yourself.

It rhymes and everything!

An Ode to Burger and Lobster

You welcomed me with a friendly smile.
Brought me in. Put my name on the list.
The queue outside went on for a mile.
But in I was and I couldn’t resist,
whilst I waited for my friend,
a great, cold, crisp wine.
A bottle not a glass.
No need to pretend.
And as a result, whilst we waited to dine,
the time flew by and did merrily pass.

Then down from heaven came Andrew Flood.
All Irish charm and a mullet to match.
We wanted the lobster, was it good, was it good?
The best in London, a fantastic catch.
Get one between yous, that’s my advice.
Better in the long run
he proudly announced.
Then you girls won’t be paying for shells twice.
So we plumped for a big one.
Three pounds and five ounce!

First came the salad, the fries, the sauce.
Wet wipes for our fingers, a bib for our shirt.
Wipe that smirk off your face, you’ll need em in due course.
When you’re licking your fingers, all covered in dirt.
Oh lobster magnificent.
You tasted divine.
Perfectly perfect or that’s how it seemed.
My next visit is imminent.
The very second I have the time.
Til then, dear lobster. You’ll remain in my dreams.

Ok you can stop laughing now, it’s the thought that counts :0)

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